Flatcest – a very popular term at my university and almost everyone I know here has a story about it. For those who aren’t familiar with the term it refers to hooking up with the people you live with. Put a group of teenagers together, living away from home for the first time and inevitably you’ll end up with some awkward hookups or at least some awkward feelings.

Flatcest comes in two forms:

• Random, one-time hookups, often when drunk. No/minimal feelings involved
• Developing feelings for a flatmate and starting a relationship

Unsurprisingly, both forms are widely regarded as a bad idea. Form one – one-time hookups – can lead to a lot of awkwardness in the morning and, almost certainly, regret. You can’t just walk away in the morning; you have to see this person everyday for the rest of the year. However, whilst the regret stays, the awkwardness does tend to dissipate quite quickly.

Relationships within the flat can have more disastrous consequences. Arguments and bad breakups can create longer-lasting tension throughout the entire flat, and it can’t be pleasant to have to live with your ex.

It would seem logical that flatcest would just be avoided, right? There’s a whole university full of students so just don’t get involved with your flatmates. But, in my experience at least, it’s never quite as easy as that.

My experiences

Within two months of university 2 instances of flatcest had occurred in my flat alone. I can’t even count how many other instances of flatcest I know from other flats. One flatcest event was a drunken hookup. This story deserves its own post so keep an eye out!

The other instance of flatcest is a relationship between two of my flatmates. One of them came to university already in an albeit rocky relationship. Within a few weeks, they had broken up and my two flatmates started seeing each other. Another month or so later they became officially boyfriend and girlfriend.

Everyone from our friends to their parents said the same thing – don’t **** where you eat. The rest of the flat also were asked a question repeatedly – who’s side will you be on in a fight?

Despite all the doubts, they’re going strong and it hasn’t been a point of tension in our flat. In fact, they’re great together. The flat knows that it might not last and it could cause us a lot of trouble. However, we do all want them last and maybe flatcest isn’t as terrible as everyone makes out.

I hope the best for them – especially as I’m living with both of them next year!